I think babies are the coolest. All species, it doesn’t matter. Small little friends arriving by the second on this planet and I wish I could protect ALL of them. I was surprised to hear that the only species whose offspring will die without any assistance is the human baby. And we dominate this planet? Not bloody likely.

I was not blessed with kids, but Karen and I actually came close to being parents in 2001. Evidently, it wasn’t in God’s plan. That is why I loved coaching Pop Warner football so much. Every year I was blessed with about 40 boys and girls, to teach the game of football. But I wanted to teach some important lessons such as teamwork, inclusion, pride, and self-confidence. It was amazing; I would be assigned my team roster (including cheerleaders) for the season. We would meet for practice starting on August 1st. So I have these boys training and conditioning for the first two weeks before being allowed to start contact drills. In two more weeks, these little guys had gone from bumping into each other to executing the wishbone offense to perfection. Some of my most prized possessions are the signed footballs the teams gave me at our season-ending banquets. Thanks again, God for those opportunities to feel the responsibility of caring for children and helping me improve their lives, even just a skoshi.

It’s hard to find an ugly baby. Even ugly babies are cute. Ever seen a tiny baby alligator? So cute. All the way up to when you feel its jaws crack your skull in its powerful jaws and your light is extinguished. See how quickly I segue from cute babies to deadly alligator head-crushings?

Something is seriously wrong with me.

I am sure one of the contributing factors was when we were living on Tachikawa Air Force base in Japan. The year was 1961 and when I say there were big mosquitoes there, I mean there were BIG mosquitoes there. It was not unusual for my mom to find blood spots on my sheets where the pests had feasted the night before.

DDT was the miracle solution. The pesticide was banned in 1972. Very harmful environmental effects especially to birdlife. Some espouse possible links to cancer and other terrible maladies, but to us it was nothing more than a “fun cloud” exercise that we performed nightly during the summer months, the height of malaria season. You see, a big yellow truck would wind through the residential streets spewing a huge cloud of smoke (DDT) behind them. Here’s the weird part. About fifty or so kids would get in this cloud and follow it around the base. We would spend up to an hour in this deadly fog. Every night. No, I’m not screwed up. Why do you ask?

Stay well.

Published by maddogg09

I am an unmotivated genius with an extreme love for anything that moves the emotional needles of our lives.

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