Cheaters

I hate cheaters.

In anything.

I joke about the difference in competitive spirit between my wife and I by saying, “Karen thinks that everyone who merely shows up to an athletic event should get some sort of  “prize,” rewarding them for absolutely nothing.”

And me? I will cheat at solitaire to win.

It is a joke, because I learned early, that you only cheat yourself and you exclude yourself from the mainstream who will now and forever brand you as a cheat.

As I tried to explain to my very non-competitive spouse, “If you lose in anything, you are a loser, you will wear loser clothes, eat loser food, get a loser job, and die a loser’s death.”

She doesn’t get it.

Cheat codes.

How much of a douchebag do you have to be to get cheat codes so you can play a game better?

Go the fuck outside.

Unplug.

See that?

That’s a tree, and that green stuff is grass…

I have been posting my wake and bake jam sessions on my Facebook profile Maddogg’s Music.

Check ‘em out.

Stuffing fish with weights?

Awesome that the entire planet now knows what skanky losers with a capital “L” you are.

I never cheated in school; didn’t have to. I was the one who everyone resented because I did school on my own schedule, and passed with top grades in spite of doing very little actual studying.

How?

Eidetic memory.

Keep in mind this was after maybe smoking a couple joints in my entire life up to this point, so I was still very much a fresh mind.

Now, over a hundred acid trips, pounds of psychedelic mushrooms and cocaine later, my memory is not as acute as it once was. I am sure my consumption of Seagram’s Canadian VO put at least one of the heirs through an Ivy League school.

So it is understandable how I have lost a bit.

The term “cheating death” is bestowed upon those thrill-seekers that jump off buildings, mountains, out of planes, whatever gets the adrenaline going. I think it is more like Flaunting Life.

With all of life being just a game of percentages, I can unequivocally say that I will not % not die by jumping off a building or mountain.

100%.

Cheating for money, although so popular, I still find such an empty pursuit.

Academic dishonesty I find most distasteful.

I think it comes from my time in my “retirement job” as an Academic Counselor. I advised students and those taking courses with which I was familiar, I could advise very effectively.

I advised educators from high school teachers to Principals and Deans.

I used to think all the time growing up, that you went to school, majored in education and teaching, got your diploma, put an apple on your desk, and you were home free.

Forever.

Far from it.

Educators, at all levels have ongoing learning for certifications and licensures.

Forever.

I know, huh?

And now, no one wants to teach.

Treasure the ones that still want to.

And if you idiots in Administration want to really show the world something, pay these people for what they contribute to our children, and hence our future.

Just had to get that out this morning.

Stay well.