Somebody Please Explain it to Me

Why is it?

We are still in the unpacking stage and will be for some time, but I open up two boxes that I specifically took the time and effort to write on in BIG letters: TRASH—KAREN DO NOT PACK!!! Please note that there were three exclamation points written in bold on both boxes (on 2 sides of the boxes to boot) but evidently, just as in real life, my words went unheeded and my strict orders merely ignored.

Welcome to 34 years of happy marriage.


I even had the sense to not get the bill for our shipping and moving costs so I could break down to the dollar, the amount each box cost extra because I WAS THROWING THEM OUT. You learn slick moves like that after a few years of marriage, but after 34, I figure I have it all figured out.

But here I sit looking at the contents of the previously-ordered destroyed useless expired warranties, warranties of items we no longer owned, extra pieces of totally useless flotsam and jetsam, wires to gadgets that no longer worked. Shredded clothing that couldn’t even be used for drop cloths. Hell, they couldn’t even be used for cloth anymore.

I knew better than to mentally prepare a lecture on the deleterious effects of wasted energy and try to explain it to a mere mortal, so I just did it inside my head only.

We have had a bit of a go in unpacking so far.

Talk about an understatement.

Try finding the TV remote in one of 86 unmarked (or marked incorrectly) boxes and that brings us to the correct way and the incorrect way to mark boxes for packing boxes for when you are moving.

The BEST method is, of course, my method.

Mark down everything that goes into the box.


There, I did it again.

However, not everyone on this planet has near the work ethic that I have always possessed, so they will take shortcuts.

“Cutting corners” as we Yanks say it.

Others might have a box, a big box, that is somewhat heavy and a little unwieldly, and it will have my wife’s (I’m not naming any names here) writing on the box.

The boxes needed an automatic rifle to penetrate the 3-inch wide tape hermetic seal that someone (Karen) who shall again go nameless packed it like this totally bullshit way.

But can innocent, unassuming moi make an innocuous suggestion?

This box was marked pillows and it indeed did have pillows, three of them, small throw pillows, that were used as packing material for our IMPORTANT PAPERS file that we did not take with us on the road trip.

Now, this was a perfect time to deliver a simple speech of some sort about the importance of proper labeling and the confusion that one might avoid if one were to have misdirected their energy.

But did I take that opportunity?


I didn’t want Karen to kick me in the bollocks.

Stay well.

Published by maddogg09

I am an unmotivated genius with an extreme love for anything that moves the emotional needles of our lives.

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