Insects

I don’t care for them.

Yes I know that insects serve a very important role in the evolution of our planet, but I still don’t like them.

Biting and stinging insects are the worst.

I had nightmares when I was a kid from the movie Day of the Locusts. The crunching sounds made by people steeping on the insects, inches deep and growing by the minute.

Gross.

How about crazy people who love insects? How fucked up do you have to be to have a single ant as your pet? If you apply critical thought, you would actually be torturing the little guy (or gal) because they are very social beings (yes I just referred to ants as beings). But again, applying critical thought, the ants have every right to be on this planet as we do.

Chew on this:

Insects are majorly-important as decomposers.

Here’s a real up-with-life thought: If there were no insects our streets all over the world would be filled with decomposing corpses, the stench of death your constant companion.

Now I am loading up a bowl of Pineapple Kush, a tasty Indica with bright green buds and long red hairs. It is more of a Sativa buzz with lots of giggles. Not bad at 30% THC.

I tell you a few things the Ohio cannabis system needs to learn how to do: how to market their products and how to dispense them. I cam home from my last visit with about twenty different glass containers, some only containing two or three buds only.

Just another thing I will take care of “when I am over everything.”

Like telling dumbass insurrectionists who attend government overthrow attempts that yes, your social media accounts serve as great evidence of your crimes and will be used against you in a court of law.

I mean what the fuck were you thinking?

Chocolate grasshoppers.

If you are a dedicated choc-o-holic like the Domestic Despot, you could probably get through them OK. I bit into one grasshopper body and the crunch was so unnerving, I deposited my breakfast all over my tennis shoes.

I am not a big chocolate guy, but I love cooking with it. The smell of the cooking and baking fine chocolate is a real joy in the kitchen.

You don’t see a lot of romanticizing insects like you do other species. Kermit the Frog, Muffy Van der Bear, and even Pepe le Peu the skunk worked, but what about Mr. Peanut? He’s just a nut with a monocle, cane, and top hat. He looks like an insect.

He’s probably the closest approximation you get to an insect.

And how about mascots? I don’t see any arthropods as spokespersons for, well, anything.

Human representatives we know of, although the jury is still out on the garish old bird who is still hawking Progressive Insurance. The little cartoon Mighty Mouse would have made a good mascot.

The heavyweight champion of mascots is the Geico Gecko.

Did you know his name is Martin?

I didn’t; I had to look it up. I guess Karen is right; you really can find anything on Google.

He was named after a business

It’s been done before.

Henry Ford, Trish Toyota and Paris Hilton all qualify.

Don’t ask me why I picked them.

Stay well.