Enjoy the Ride

A 73 year-old Australian man was pulled over for a routine traffic stop and it was discovered he was still under a suspension that would ban him from driving again for another 92 years.

He can drive again when he is 165 years-old.

I lost my license briefly after one of the many bouts I had with alcoholism and drug use (and lost), and avoided even stiffer punishment when I ended up in court a mere three weeks later and the arresting officer failed to show up for our court date and they had to let me go scot-free.

Don’t drink and drive.

Not cool.

Those whacky Israelis and their Gazan counterparts have already agreed to sit down and begin ceasefire talks, so what happens?

In the true spirit of peace and reconciliation, Israel decides to conduct one last death raid on Gaza. And if that isn’t a true show of friendship, how about we cut off all electrical to Gaza?

Israel, you guys wonder why people all over the planet hate you?

Because you are always doing two-faced shit that makes no sense.

Who do you think you are?

Americans?

Cruises are okay, except for all the kids screaming at levels that evidently only dogs and ME can hear.

And the people.

And all the noise. You go away on a cruise to get away from the daily din of life activity and escape to replace it with the loud music, screaming kids, and screaming adults.

Fun.

I guess when you remove all the annoying elements of taking a cruise, I really like sailing.

Did I read that correctly?

Musky Muskrat (remember him? Deputy Dawg’s little buddy?)

The Domestic Despot likes it when I call Elon Musk that.

Man, I’m old.

Anyways, Elon Musk net worth dropped by 100 billion dollars?

I don’t know which is more profane: the fact that he lost that much or that he had it to lose and yet it hasn’t affected him or his lifestyle one iota.

Besides, by the time he and DJT fleece the coffers, he’ll have more money than even HE can count.

It looks like the US is finally getting a handle on gun control…

Tell it to the family of the Newark, New Jersey police officer who died after being shot by a 14-year-old boy. And to the family hoping and praying their husband and father wins his fight for life.

You’ll love this.

The good ‘ol US of A, that’s right, the Alpha, the paragon of democracy, the country that ALL countries wish they were, has been placed on a Human Rights Watchlist.

We should be proud…

Those dumbass stories that always start, “I own my own home and have no debt, and only $500,000 in my account.”…

Shut up.

If you ever get bored, head over to your nearest no-kill pet adoption center and drop off an old blanket you don’t use much, or old toys your pet no longer plays with. While you are there, thank the people doing God’s work taking care of animals.

If he were here, he would do it himself.

Stay well.