Movin’ on Out

Done deal. We are no longer in our lovely domicile in Avondale, AZ. The funds have hit the account, the desert is in our rear-view mirror, and we are in a hotel in Albuquerque. I will wait until I give the customer service liaison an opportunity to answer my written missive before I put anythingContinue reading “Movin’ on Out”

The Friendly Skies

Where did they go? People are going absolutely batshit crazy on planes. If you know me, my solution comes in one word. Parachute. I hope they increase the penalties to include mandatory jail time and a felony on the record. The Domestic Despot Osama bin Karen and I were just discussing this same subject notContinue reading “The Friendly Skies”

Ship Ahoy

You know, I always thought of the pirate as a romantic figure. Sailing across the open seas, obviously privy to some of the most beautiful sunsets known to man. However, it is hard to imagine one pirate playfully nudging a shipmate and commenting on how beautiful the sunset was and how its colors simply dancedContinue reading “Ship Ahoy”

The Dance

I can dance. Certainly not as well as I think I can, but I have rhythm and a good sense of beat to at least not be “that guy” on the dance floor; flailing, spinning, and generally avoiding falling down to any music, except jazz. But who dances to jazz? Not cool enough. Jazz buffsContinue reading “The Dance”

Cry Baby

I’m a cry baby. I admit it. It’s hard to refute when you are sitting there watching a sad movie and the waterworks begin. Since it is part of me, I’ve never cared to downplay it. I’m not embarrassed by it; it’s just who I am. I used to tell my friends I would kickContinue reading “Cry Baby”

Mice

Reposted from June 3: I talk about the craziest shit, don’t I? I kid you not. The dirty disease-laden rodents scare the hell out of me. I don’t care how small the little bastards are, I don’t want to touch them. I have been fortunate not to have had to grown up with mice runningContinue reading “Mice”

Bowling

Is bowling still a thing? Growing up, my parents got me out of the house, busying me with swimming, camping, and other activities. My siblings and I were all very active in sports. Bowling kind of came up around age 8 and lost its magic by the time age 12 rolled around. I never consideredContinue reading “Bowling”

Put Me in Coach

Ah, John Fogerty singing Centerfield. You know, I have been out of commission for the better part of a month now with my knee injury finally nearing the last stages of sealing and healing. It feels like I am always saying that. As we ready for our trip East, I feel like I will beContinue reading “Put Me in Coach”