I left the hospital yesterday afternoon but not before I started walking my way out because it was taking too long for someone to bring me a wheelchair. Something about reducing the hospital’s liability. Sounded to me like they were just buying time. Time that I don’t have since this was my 23rd invasive surgery.Continue reading “The Return of the Satin Latin”
Category Archives: Short stories
Thanks But No Thanks
Before I became the Sexiest Amputee on Earth, I roamed the countryside with reckless abandon and two legs that very much resembled a Michelangelo statue. My parents raised me right and I have always respected any handicapped person with no sense of sympathy. I was raised to help people in need. People that legitimately neededContinue reading “Thanks But No Thanks”
Licenses
Who came up with the idea of licensing things? I am sure it could only happen in a capitalist climate. A way to keep track of someone or something and generate income doing so. I am writing about licenses because the mean, racist old lady at the Ohio Bureau of Motor Vehicles sent me homeContinue reading “Licenses”
Even Ripley Won’t Believe This!
We are still in the stages of unpacking and I get to the box with my important papers in it. I was needing my birth certificate to present so I can get an Ohio driver’s license. For the very first time in my life (it only took 67 years) I actually read my certificate. MyContinue reading “Even Ripley Won’t Believe This!”
Privacy
So it is about six o’clock and my two doggies are getting restless. There is a small elementary school about a block away and we take the boys there to run in the large fields. Best on the weekends, but after school, it is an awesome dog run. I love watching the two knuckleheads runningContinue reading “Privacy”
I Was Scammed
Who done me wrong? That fat Gregory the Groundhog or Chucky the Woodchuck as Karen calls it, is nowhere to be seen. After reporting his existence on the weekend, his presence and the danger he represented to my two Cocker Spaniels prompted me to call a Wildlife Rescue organization to remove and relocate the pudgyContinue reading “I Was Scammed”
Fog
I forgot how much I missed it . So many years have passed since I remember foggy days and nights, but when I woke up this morning, I could not see across the street to my neighbors’ houses. Of course in England we had the proverbial “thick as pea soup” fog that severely limited carContinue reading “Fog”
Bigger Than I Ever Knew
I am on record as saying my big brother Ed is one of my biggest heroes and I always wondered what it would be like to bear the responsibility of having a younger sibling. I had a chance to find out when I was in my late thirties. I was living in Norman, Oklahoma andContinue reading “Bigger Than I Ever Knew”
Meat Eater
I am a carnivore and I have already eaten way more meat than I ever should have eaten, but I make no excuses. My father and Grandfather were both butchers and worked in slaughterhouses. I remember being horrified at the sight of the cows being led up the chutes and the man shooting them inContinue reading “Meat Eater”
Well Do Ya Punk?
Do you feel lucky? If so, why? Do you have a talisman or symbol of some sort that you use to summon up an extra “edge” to ensure success? How about a dance routine or soliloquy that you absolutely must perform pre-game or you risk pissing off the Sports Gods and dooming your teams’ chancesContinue reading “Well Do Ya Punk?”
