Better Late?

If you call me up and don’t start speaking within the first five seconds, my ass is gonna hang up on your ass and I will block your number for all-time. Pet peeve? Probably more like a foible. Although I am actually avoiding the Old Man Syndrome where everything irritates you, and that is probablyContinue reading “Better Late?”

Perspectives

This oughta be fun. The family that took in South Korean tourists during the recent deadly snowstorm in upstate New York should make every TRUE American proud to be one.. In a time when everyone and everything is suspect, trust and compassion won out and the world, for just one second in time, became closer.Continue reading “Perspectives”

Better Late Than Never

I used to love to watch the show Cold Case and enjoyed watching them reopen past cases that had gone “cold” for a variety of reasons which prevented justice from being carried out. The lead girl was a little pasty-looking and anemic, but she was watchable. Fuck the statute of limitations. Crime is crime andContinue reading “Better Late Than Never”

Did I Read That Right?

Did that silly little asshole Putin threaten the United States because we are sending Patriot missile defense systems to Ukraine? He better shut the fuck up and watch his six. Ukraine is winning the war without our Patriot missile defense systems. They are enduring blackouts, genocide, and murder at the hands of a godless Russia.Continue reading “Did I Read That Right?”

What is a Man?

You are not a man just because you have a penis. Let’s start with the biological, which you can’t do anymore due to the advent of sexual surgery. Besides, the Keeper of the Penis may not identify it as a penis. I will stop here before I either crack up or throw up. Don’t anyoneContinue reading “What is a Man?”

Why I Do It

I get asked why I play these little charity gigs for Nursing Homes and Rehab Centers and now, I have opened up communication with Dayton Children’s Hospital to see if I can please a few kids this Christmas. All you have to do is walk into SycamoreSpring Nursing Home. The first thing you notice isContinue reading “Why I Do It”

Wait for it…

This is a short story I wrote on about a fifteen minute break from working the restaurant at closing time. Trust           At approximately 1:30 am Eastern Standard Time, at a family-dining chain restaurant in central Florida, an ex-employee pushed his way through the back door and into the kitchen. His two friends quickly dartedContinue reading “Wait for it…”

Board Games

I didn’t talk to my stepfather for two weeks because he beat me in chess one time. It had taken me years to get to the point where I could finally beat him and like the terrible winner I was, I didn’t let a day go by without reminding him who was the chess masterContinue reading “Board Games”

Fat People and Other Things.

Relax. I’m not shaming fat people. Hell, I used to be one myself. When I was working as a French chef, I weighed 280 pounds. And I wasn’t any taller. I got my fat honestly from being a raging alcoholic and eating French delicacies day and night. And any reasonable person might think I wouldContinue reading “Fat People and Other Things.”

Christmas Commercials Already?

I saw my first one today (9/6) and I made a mental note to never shop from the particular advertiser for this holiday season, or ANY holiday season until time immemorial. That’s how much I appreciate their initiative. When I am over everything, I keep telling the Domestic Despot, one of the changes I willContinue reading “Christmas Commercials Already?”