The Daily Mail reports that little bald dumbass lawn gnome Vladimir Putin has gone on record as saying the recent killing of Ayatollah Khamenei is a “cynical violation of morality and international law.” STFU. Like you are any better ex-KGB thug and murderous bastard. Spain isn’t allowing old Poopypants Trump to use its bases inContinue reading “Pot Meet Kettle”
Tag Archives: news
Hear Ye! Hear Ye!
The BBC is reporting on a deadly shooting in an Austin, Texas bar that left two dead and fourteen wounded. This act of EXTREME violence is being called a “possible act of terrorism.” I have questions (of course). What the hell ISN’T a “possible act of terrorism” anymore? What the hell are the BBC doingContinue reading “Hear Ye! Hear Ye!”
Don’t Blink
1973. An awesome year and the last time the United States government conscripted young men into our military war machine. A headline read Donald Jr. and Eric Trump “would be exempt from military draft for one key reason…” Could the reason be they are yellow-belly chickenshits like their father who dodged the draft five times?Continue reading “Don’t Blink”
Nothing is Possible
Not anymore. Not for everyone. Add Goldie Hawn, once one of the cutest faces in all of celebrityhood (did I just invent another word?) to the list of desperate old buzzards clinging fiercely to their last vestiges of youth with beauty-destroying cosmetic surgery. Artificial cheekbones. Plastic skin pulled tight. Duck lips. Sad. James Blair possessesContinue reading “Nothing is Possible”
Couldn’t Do it Without You
You mean to tell me with all his billions and all the billions more he and Elon Musk have stolen so far from the American people, he has to wear a store bought wig? Cold. When I saw the tag I had to double and triple-check just to make sure, and one thing I haveContinue reading “Couldn’t Do it Without You”
Play it Again
In the “New Normal” what do you do when your popularity poll numbers are embarrassingly, irreversibly low? You stop taking the poll, silly. If that doesn’t make you swell with national pride, what does? Just another “thanks, but no thanks.” Greenland has turned down an offer from the United States who offered medical care forContinue reading “Play it Again”
Never Surrender
Unless you have to. New York City Mayor Zohran Mamdani is endorsing Kathy Hochul’s bid for reelection as Governor. And he’s getting a load of shit for it. Why? Why is he endorsing her or why is he catching hell for it? He’s endorsing her because she has shown a willingness to work together withContinue reading “Never Surrender”
Look Into the Abyss
Even the Washington Post knows when enough is enough. Jeff Bezos’ next move will probably be to rename the paper the Trump-Washington Post and skip a few steps. Besides, what do we need pesky old impartial news for anyway? We have Trump to tell us what, and how, to think. In a few years, they’llContinue reading “Look Into the Abyss”
Afterthoughts II
Our high schoolers are continuing the slide down the educational ladder, as their scores drop to a new low. Who needs silly old education anyway? People keep reporting Trump is dead, but really, he just looks that way. Newsweek is reporting Gen Z is experiencing “a drop in life satisfaction.” Darn. I was hoping toContinue reading “Afterthoughts II”
Take a Hike
So it’s not just arrogant Americans… Australia has its share of dumbasses who have no respect for nature or the planet on which we dwell. Don’t they have a clue what “protected” forests are? People like them should leave our ecosystem. They are just taking up good oxygen that a tree or bush could beContinue reading “Take a Hike”