The Daily Mail reports that little bald dumbass lawn gnome Vladimir Putin has gone on record as saying the recent killing of Ayatollah Khamenei is a “cynical violation of morality and international law.” STFU. Like you are any better ex-KGB thug and murderous bastard. Spain isn’t allowing old Poopypants Trump to use its bases inContinue reading “Pot Meet Kettle”
Category Archives: Short stories
So You’re Telling Me There’s a Chance…
It is a rainy day in southern Ohio which is one of the reasons it is so green and beautiful once spring and summer hit and I am practicing for an open mic at a popular Dayton pub tomorrow night. We only get a 30-minute timeslot so here are the songs I plan to play:Continue reading “So You’re Telling Me There’s a Chance…”
Nothing is Possible
Not anymore. Not for everyone. Add Goldie Hawn, once one of the cutest faces in all of celebrityhood (did I just invent another word?) to the list of desperate old buzzards clinging fiercely to their last vestiges of youth with beauty-destroying cosmetic surgery. Artificial cheekbones. Plastic skin pulled tight. Duck lips. Sad. James Blair possessesContinue reading “Nothing is Possible”
Ask the Wizard
It’s about an hour away from the president’s State of the Union address and I am awaiting it with the same anticipation I had when waiting for the next Jerry Lewis movie in the 50’s and 60’s—I couldn’t wait to see what that zany whackenheimer was going to say or do next… {NOTE: since IContinue reading “Ask the Wizard”
A Trampoline Can Be Dangerous
Bone spurs. His dad paid a doctor to falsely diagnose, treat, and document his “medical condition” so he wouldn’t have to serve in the armed forces. That must be why he’s so upset that he wasn’t awarded the Congressional Medal of Honor like all the other of our nations real military heroes, many of whomContinue reading “A Trampoline Can Be Dangerous”
Your Guess is as Good as Mine
Maybe even better. Kid Rock had one good song (Cowboy), and he thinks he’s a music icon now. The song that was released in 1998. Age does not make you iconic. If he thinks for one second that he can command ticket prices of $5,000 for his upcoming tour, well then this extra from theContinue reading “Your Guess is as Good as Mine”
Crazy You Should Mention That
The political landscape in this country is a crumbling, unstable vestige of a democracy with entitled, crepe paper-skinned old buzzards aging out and turning senile before the eyes of the world. No wonder the newer generations have such a nihilistic view of the world. I would much rather see suicide rates go through the roofContinue reading “Crazy You Should Mention That”
Remember?
You would go to a football game and at halftime, you might make it to the concession stand for a few snacks and beers, and when you got back, the marching bands were taking their turns stomping the field? Then halftime was over. Not anymore. Halftime has now been turned into a battleground of politicalContinue reading “Remember?”
Never Surrender
Unless you have to. New York City Mayor Zohran Mamdani is endorsing Kathy Hochul’s bid for reelection as Governor. And he’s getting a load of shit for it. Why? Why is he endorsing her or why is he catching hell for it? He’s endorsing her because she has shown a willingness to work together withContinue reading “Never Surrender”
Wake Me When It’s Over
Los Angeles, the City of Angels, is the site of the latest group of anti-ICE protesters jumping up and getting froggy with Kristi Noem’s gang. My money is on ICE. They have guns, have shown that they will not hesitate to use them, and if they err, it ill be on the side of stomp-your-face-first-ask-questions-laterContinue reading “Wake Me When It’s Over”
